Stadium Info FANFARE Score: 4.00
1776 USA Election Central
Everywhere, USA 17760
Year Opened: 1776
Capacity: 155 million for the 2020 contest
Electoral College Stadium Hosts the Big Event
The Electoral College Stadium is one of the most unique sports facilities in the USA. It hosts only one game, the Electoral College Bowl and the game is only held once every four years on the first Tuesday in November.
Among the impressive numbers at the Electoral College Stadium is its capacity….155 million fans have participated in the Electoral College Bowl in person over the last two election cycles. The press box at the facility is the largest in the world, as a worldwide press contingent has a great interest in the winner of the contest.
We’re not just talking about sportswriters… this includes press staff from global governments, defense contractors, and political special interest groups, as well as the “non-partisan” press from CNN, MSNBC, CNBC, FOX, One America Network, Newsmax, etc. Network insiders/political influencers always get preferred seating in the press areas.
The Electoral College Bowl has also experienced some on-field controversies in recent seasons, especially during the 2000 and 2020 contests. The referees, members of the Supreme Court in their zebra-striped robes, have the final say on controversial plays. Their decision is final… there are no grounds for an appeal. Of course, the team on the losing side of a call will then accuse the winning side of stacking the referee squad.
Food & Beverage 3
The two sets of fans at the Electoral College Bowl Stadium cannot even agree on a standard set of food items at the concession stands. Therefore, the stands on the opposite sides of the field serve fare in line with their squad’s preferred food platform. While the Donkeys’ Blue Ribbon Stand favors lots of ethnic and soul foods, the Red Elephants’ Rockin’ Red Stand carries BBQ and other country club favorites.
Atmosphere 5
Qualifying for the next Electoral College Bowl typically gets underway in January before the Bowl game. These preliminary contests often take place on the frozen tundra of fields located in the states of Iowa and New Hampshire. These early contests separate the contenders from the pretenders. This gets the political blood of the competing teams going for another election season.
At the opposite end of the political spectrum is the Electoral College Bowl, the culminating event of the political season. It is preceded by pep rallies, otherwise known as conventions, held by each competing team. These events are important, as they determine the strategies to be employed by each team going into the final quarter of the political season.
Speakers range from former team leaders to up-and-comers who may lead the teams in future years. Celebrity guests are also invited to these conventions, as they raise the TV ratings and help the celebrities meet the “right people” in the media world. The conventions also serve a function of choosing an assistant coach in case… well… there was Watergate…. And the head coach might be tossed out of the game!
There are times when the battle between the parties somewhat goes out of control, resulting in some unsportsmanlike conduct, such as some mudslinging taking place. In these situations, the officials are quick to file injunctions to get the offending players calmed back down.
Gameday is really about the fans. By now, the two finalists have completed the X’s and O’s of their game plans and published them in their team program, or platform. The supporters of the Democratic Donkey team wear their blue team colors proudly and sit on the left (liberal) side of the election field, while the red-clad Republican Elephant supporters sit on the right (conservative) side of the field. Any Independents that somehow get in the Electoral College Bowl are confined to the area behind the end zone… looking wistfully at the playing field they cannot earn a spot on.
As soon as the Electoral College Bowl ends, the polls reopen to gauge the up-and-coming teams at the city, state, and federal levels. These teams compete at a separate level, namely the Federal, City, and State levels, known as the FCS.
Neighborhood 5
Electoral College Stadium is unique in that its seating bowl is not set up based on rows or aisles. Instead, fans of each team are seated by precinct. This allows the political stand managers to easily identify problem areas and dispatch a squad of political consultants to decide what platform corrections can be made quickly to bring the voters in those areas back in line with the party’s platform. The seating precincts are subject to alterations between the election cycles due to redistricting.
Fans 5
Electoral College Stadium and the Electoral College Bowl draw fans from all 50 states and some U.S. Territories. The fan bases are about equally distributed between the Democratic Blue Donkeys and the Republican Red Elephants. Every few years a registered Independent fan tries to sneak in, but the polls have never allowed the Independents to get as far as the Electoral College Bowl Game due to the stringent eligibility requirements. (Plus, they don’t stand a chance of winning against the big boys!).
Even though each fan base is solid in support of their party, some fans waver when gameday arrives. This a big negative, and the offending fan is in danger of being accused of being a “moderate,” which is akin to being called a scab in this ultimately political game.
Attending a game at Electoral College Stadium does come with restrictions. Fans must be at least 18 years old and must be registered voters. No kids allowed! Each fan is limited to one ticket per ballot. Tickets may not be sold or transferred to another person. Some photo ID may be required at the gate by a poll watcher. (i.e., so no one cheats!)
Access 3
Gamedays at Electoral College Stadium get underway as the gates typically open at 7 am, and do not close for 12 hours. However, you often must leave before the final score/stats are determined.
Access to the Electoral College Stadium is restricted to persons over 18, who have not committed any Federal crimes (or at least have not been caught) and are residents of the U.S.A.
Ticket takers at the gates of the stadium are Secret Service agents who have the right to frisk anyone who might be deemed as a danger to members of the winning/losing Electoral College Bowl teams.
Fat cats and special interest groups are allowed admittance to the Smoked Filled Room luxury boxes atop the stadium.
Members and supporters of the losing squad in the contest are prohibited from the Smoke-filled Room Luxury Box for the next four years.
Return on Investment 4
The Electoral College Bowl is one of the most expensive college contests in the world, as fans, corporate fat cats special interest groups, and plain small donors compete in the contest to influence the winner of the Electoral College Bowl Game. Tickets go for face value… it is the table funding that gets favorable consideration from the winning team. Depending on the legislation passed, or favors done, some attendees DO see a favorable return on their investment.
Extras 3
Fans in attendance need to choose a side before taking part in the Electoral College Bowl. If you don’t make a choice, you have no right to complain for the next four years!
The perks to being a supporter of the winning squad in the game may include entry into one of the many Washington galas, a prime seat at the Inaugural Parade, or a possible appointment as a member of the Presidential Cabinet.
The 2000 game featuring Al Gore as the leader of the Democratic Donkeys squad and George W. Bush as the captain of the Republican team holds the Electoral College Bowl record for overtime. It finally was decided by the infamous “hanging chads” call by the court/bowl zebras, which awarded the win to the Red squad.
Final Thoughts
The electoral college stadium has lasted for nearly 250 years. It has survived wars, depressions, good times and bad. Just like any structure, it has some imperfections and is subject to criticism from the fans, who point out the flaws in the structure.
What is most important is that its once in every four years schedule for the Big Game allows the fans from both teams to have a say in the game strategy for their respective squads. Like any contest, after the whistle blows to signal the end of the game, both parties shake hands to acknowledge the winner.... and that's the American Way.
Comments